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Falling in love is taking one of the biggest risks in life as you are entrusting someone with your heart and soul. The feeling when someone you have trusted with your life breaks the trust and the bond you have worked hard to build is the worst kind of pain you can ever experience. The big question, however, is what do you do when you are cheated on?
Do you leave your partner, do you stay and work things out, do you lash out and break things or do you go after the other woman?
Here are a few points that can guide you on what you can do when your partner is unfaithful
Play DCI and gather information
Information is power and when your partner is unfaithful, there is no bigger weapon against them than information.
Find out how long they have been cheating, who they have been cheating with, what the nature of their relationship is, if it is just a causal relationship or if they have fallen in love with each other.
Keep screenshots of their conversations and have recordings of their phone calls if you can. When you confront your cheating partner, you will have the power since you have all the evidence you need to prove they have been unfaithful.
If your partner confesses to you, then ask them why they cheated, why they did not talk to you if there was a problem, how long they have been cheating and what they intend to do now that they have confessed. This information will help you make a decision.
Leave the relationship
Staying with someone who just crushed your heart by cheating on you tends to complicate matters for you. The moment you discover your partner has been unfaithful, feel free to leave the relationship maybe until you are ready to talk about the issue at hand.
Sticking around your partner will most likely cause anger build up that might end up making you do the extreme. If you are cohabiting and you do not want to leave your home, you could ask your partner to give you space to think things through.
Spend time with your closest friends
Discovering your partner has cheated on you can destroy you emotionally. You need your friends to help bring you back to your old fun self. Go to a friend’s house and spend as much time with them as possible. Being alone leads to more stress and in turn you will be making those hasty decisions that you will later end up regretting.
Your friends will also help you by advising you and keeping you from making any bad decisions.
Allow yourself to cry your heart out
Crying is considered a sign of weakness by many but at times it is the most therapeutic way to release pain and anger.
Crying helps you to release the built up tension during this time and helps you clear your thoughts so you can make a clearer decisions.
Find a quiet place to open your heart and cry as much as you want. You can always scream into your pillow to release the anger.
Talk to your best friend and let them offer you a shoulder to cry on.
Do not blame yourself
You will find yourself taking the blame for your partner’s cheating. You will find reasons to defend him and look back at what you may have done that could have led them to consider straying.
Try your best and remember that the fault is entirely on them and not you. This is a decision they made on their own, and they did not think about you nor your feelings.
The views and opinions expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of Evewoman.co.ke